The Branch

🏢 Welcome to The Branch — The Ultimate Office Idle RPG for Discord

You've just been promoted to Manager of a brand-new regional paper company. It starts small. One desk. One printer. Zero employees. But with enough hustle, shrewd investments, and the right staff on your payroll, you'll climb from a nobody in a strip mall to a Regional Manager running a corporate empire.

(We checked. There is no "Assistant to the Regional Manager." Only the Regional Manager. That position does not exist.)

Getting started takes seconds:

Type /install in your server to add The Branch and get set up instantly. Type /branch and your office comes to life. Everything happens inside a single, interactive dashboard. No commands to memorize — just click your way to the top.

📋 How It Works The Branch is a persistent, text-based idle RPG played entirely through Discord's button interface. No menus to navigate. No TPS reports to file. Just click your way to the top.

Every decision you make matters. Upgrade your office. Hire your staff. Play the stock market. Sabotage your rivals. The grind never stops — and neither does the money (if you play your cards right).

☕ Did you get the memo about the new cover sheets? Yeah, we're going to need you to go ahead and check those.

🗂️ The Dashboard Tabs ⚙️ Operations Your home base. Collect passive Sales Commissions from your staff, close Direct Sales Calls for instant cash, and claim your Daily Streak Bonus — which grows the longer you log in consecutively. Miss a day and your streak resets. Don't miss a day.

🏗️ Upgrades Invest your earnings back into the office. Upgrade your Printer to close bigger deals — because nothing is more dangerous to productivity than a paper jam at 4:58 PM on a Friday. Buy better Desks to raise maximum morale. Unlock new rooms that open entire new areas of the game:

📞 Reception — Unlocks Daily Streak Bonuses 👔 HR Department — Unlocks staff hiring & Office Pranks 📊 Accounting — Unlocks the Stock Market 🗄️ The Annex — Permanently reduces your maintenance tax (the Annex people are fine, they're used to it) 🤝 Meeting Room — Unlocks Corporate Acquisitions & Leaderboard 🪑 Boss Office — Unlocks the Prestige system 👔 HR Department Hire Office Sales Reps and Warehouse Workers to passively generate income around the clock. Your staff roster shows every employee, their bonuses, and their rarity — with clean page-by-page navigation so it never gets cluttered.

Don't like someone? Fire them. HR won't stop you. HR is deeply uncomfortable about it, but they won't stop you.

📦 Warehouse Buy raw materials, craft paper orders, and ship them out for profit. Pick up a Side Hustle business on the side — because one revenue stream is never enough, and the beet farm isn't going to run itself.

📈 The Market Play the in-game Stock Market with four unique company stocks — including BEET Corp, for the agriculturally inclined investor. Prices fluctuate with live market ticks. Buy low, sell high. Or buy high, panic-sell low. We don't judge.

Unlock Insider Trading from the Black Market for a guaranteed tip on the next tick direction. Is it legal? In this economy? Nobody's asking questions.

🏢 Corporate Expand your empire by acquiring rival branches in Utica, Nashua, and Stamford. Climb the Board of Directors global leaderboard. Contribute to the PPC Charity Drive for server-wide rewards. And when you've truly conquered the paper industry, trigger a full Corporate Restructure (Prestige) to start over — faster and more powerful.

☕ Break Room Every office has one. Ours has better returns:

🎰 Vending Machine Slots — Pull the lever and pray 🪙 Warehouse Bets — Classic coin flip, double or nothing 🃏 Blackjack — Go up against the dealer for big cash 🎯 Office Pranks — Spend money to destroy a rival's morale. Options include Stapler in Jello, Fax Bomb, Vending Machine Wallet, Desk in the Washroom, Meatball'd, and the legendary Megadesk. Some of these are crimes in several states. Allegedly. 🕶️ The Black Market — Spend exclusive Corporate Bonds for game-changing advantages 💼 The Briefcase System The real prize. Open Briefcases to recruit Named Characters with unique passive buffs — each one a lovingly crafted original personality straight out of the fluorescent-lit hellscape we call the modern workplace.

Named Characters are far more powerful than generic hires, providing massive, stackable bonuses to your income. Think of them less like employees and more like investments. Investments that technically require health insurance.

Characters come in four rarities:

✨ Rare — A solid find. Worth keeping. ⭐ Epic — A serious upgrade. 💎 Legendary — Almost impossible to pull. Completely game-changing. The kind of hire that makes you say "...that's what she said." Think you need an edge? Pick up a Golden Briefcase from the Company Store for dramatically improved odds on Epic and Legendary pulls.

🏆 Progression & Prestige The grind has a ceiling — and it's called Regional Manager. Hit $1,000,000 in net worth and earn the title. It should have happened years ago, frankly. You've been carrying this branch.

Want to go further? Trigger a Corporate Restructure (Prestige) to reset your branch with permanent multipliers that stack across every future run. Each loop is faster. Each run more powerful. The paper business never truly ends — it only gets more efficient.

🌐 Global Events The whole server plays together. Random Global Events shake up the economy for everyone at once — boosting payouts, crashing markets, or triggering the legendary Pretzel Day event for a server-wide 2x income multiplier.

🥨 When Pretzel Day hits, nothing else matters. Not the quarterly report. Not the Stamford merger. Nothing.

🖨️ A Note on the Printer The printer will jam. It always jams. That's not a bug. That's the authentic office experience. You can fix it in the HR tab — it boosts your office morale and is significantly more satisfying than actually fixing a printer.

"PC LOAD LETTER? What does that even mean?"

🛒 Company Store Support the bot and get real perks. The Company Store (powered by Discord's built-in purchase system) offers:

🏷️ VIP Subscription — Reduced cooldowns, bonus income multipliers, and a shiny [VIP] tag on the leaderboard 🎫 Corporate Bonds — The exclusive Black Market currency 💼 Golden Briefcase — Your best shot at a Legendary character 🔗 Links & Support Have a question? Found a bug? Want to suggest a feature? Want to complain about the printer? Join our support server — real humans respond fast.

👉 Support Server: https://discord.gg/sFthcqM4Bj

The Branch is actively developed and updated regularly. New features, characters, events, and upgrades are added all the time. The paper business waits for no one — so get to work.

...And please, for the love of all things holy, do not set the building on fire.